And it begins ALREADY...

"The people walking in darkness have seen a great light" ..Merry Christmas from Steubenville!

All of the best gifts come in small packages...Please pray this Advent for all born and unborn children

Photo Shoot: Just about 39 Weeks!

Happy Feast Day of St. Nicholas of Myra!!! Now...an uninhibited complaint

Standing in line at the post office today...

They offered two choices to customers for "holiday" stamps: 1) the Nutcracker; and 2) Madonna and Child...

Opting for the Nutcracker??

Since when was the Nutcracker God Incarnate? 

I am truly grieved at what Christmas is in this country. I am tired of receiving Christmas cards with icicles, reindeer, and some jelly-filled construction of Santa Claus. I am tired of St. Nicholas' charity being recast as the rich giving to the rich. I am tired of Christmas being a "gift-giving exchange" party. I am tired of hustle and bustle, but no Jesus. 

I want Jesus; You can keep the snowflake cards and glitter. 

Sitting at a deli in Pittsburgh before our last baby appointment:

Jon: At the Resurrection, my ears will be normal.  

Me: I hope not! I love your elf ears!....I wonder what Clare's ears are going to look like?

Jon: Maybe she'll get one of yours and one of mine

;)-

Went for a baby appointment today...and found out Clare has dropped lower since our last visit. Everything looks good...Let's get this show on the road!

Okay...one more "demotivator"

Just for fun...A spin on the usual motivating posters..hehe

2 weeks more to go (hopefully!) ... Any random guesses on her birthday? Her "due date" is Dec 15th but only 5% of babies are so punctual as that :)-

Clearly scanning is not one of my talents. Jon is in the top photo with his dad and I am in the bottom one. I was 8 lbs 1 ounce and 21'' long. Jon was 10 lbs 3 ounces and also 21" long.

Walking up the stairs to our apartment...

Me: So tonight I think I will make you some of these bite size protein balls from a recipe I came across so that you will study better. Good protein. 

Jon: That sounds good

Me: Yeah. They have crunchy peanut butter, sesame seeds, flax seed, sunflower seeds, honey, oats, and you roll them in cotton

Jon (perplexed): Cotton?

Me: Oh no..haha..I meant coconut!

Jon: Those are some funny protein balls..rolled in cotton

haha :)-

Lately Jon has been referring to Clare as "Clefairy"...In the interest of finding out exactly what image goes through his mind as he says this, I decided to look up this Pokemon figure online. And THIS is what I found: 

Oh dear. If she comes out looking anything like this, then we have more on our hands than we imagined.

Jon in Show Business

On Friday, Jon got a call asking him if he could do a short clip for EWTN on Christian ethics. He said yes. All weekend, we had fun joking about his entrance into "show business," how he would need to find an agent, how it all starts with a 30 sec clip right before a commercial break, how he already has experience with sets and cameras since he was in our wedding video after all. 

Monday morning over breakfast...

Me: What time are you going to be filmed? Did they already film the show or are you all being filmed at the same time?

Jon (puffed up): It's in the can.

Me: What do you mean it's in the can?

Jon: That's show business talk, Lauren, and I'm in show business now, so that's what you say when something is done.

Me: Oh you have to be kidding me...lol

* In light of Jon's newfound stardom, which will probably be a never-ending joke for us now, I have to post this funny joke pulled from the website for Dr. Regis Martin's Fan Club since it relates to the show Jon was on for a few short clips:

"I believe I remember a time I was watching Franciscan University Presents and Dr. Martin, Dr. Hahn, and Fr. Mike were talking about something very spiritual...and very boring. At some point in the discussion Dr. Martin said something to the effect of, “We may want to change the subject before the eight people who are watching this show change the channel and get up to pour themselves another cup of prune juice.”

A Meditation on the Gift of Free Will

According to St. Augustine, evil comes from free will in that we have the choice to choose goodness or not. If we did not have free will, we could not truly and sincerely love God since love requires self-donation. This freedom allows us to choose the absence of goodness (since evil can hardly be said to be a reality, but rather a privation of good), but then how can that be freedom at all? Are we free when we choose darkness (the absence of light) over light? 

Fr. Ryland, a Protestant convert, on being a faithful Catholic and not picking and choosing Church teachings, thereby making yourself the final authority:

"You can't be a little bit pregnant and you can't be a little bit Catholic; you either are or you ain't"

We were also thankful tonight to receive a wonderful blessing for Clare from Fr. Ryland. It means so much to me when priests pray for her. As I type, she is moving around confirming her enthusiasm :) Every day, especially now as we near her birth, I look forward to the moment that we will finally behold her and see God's handiwork. She truly is the supreme gift of our marriage.

A life without such anticipation, a life no longer opened up to heaven, would be empty, a leaden life. That is why there are in reality no societies altogether lacking in cult. Even the decidedly atheistic, materialistic systems create their own forms of cult, though, of course, they can only be an illusion and strive in vain, by bombastic trumpeting, to conceal their nothingness.

-Cardinal Ratzinger, Pope Benedict XVI, The Spirit of the Liturgy

Do bicyclists have to buy snow tires?

36 Weeks at Tim Horton's and our first true day of snow in Pittsburgh!

Jon and I went for our 36 week baby appointment and the midwife confirmed that Clare is head down. All looks good! Please keep us in your prayers as we near her due "range." ;)

Sorry Ladies...Instead of praying for a date, pray for his vocation! ;)

http://catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=14260

At the end of our prayer before dinner...

Jon: And thank you, Lord, for our squirt (i.e., our daughter Clare!) 

I think that one might just stick..lol

Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return; the Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord

-Job 1:21

I thought he said it was "above his pay grade"????

Obama supporting the Freedom of Choice Act, horrific :  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pf0XIRZSTt8&eurl=

To fight legislation that supports abortion sign this petition: http://www.FightFOCA.com/

Every baby is incommunicable, irreplaceable, beautiful. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4WrUuyx1Ds

While we're sitting at dinner...

Me (looking at my left arm): Hey, my arm looks fat

Jon (without paying undue attention to it): No, it's the same

Me: But it's not. I remember my arm used to be the same thinness all the way down and now it's fat there. Just look.

Jon: Well, if anything it's a little swollen, that's all, just slightly.

Me: So you're agreeing it's fat?

Jon: Why won't you let me tell you what you should want to hear?

hahaha....

34 Weeks

Wacky Professor and Globe Girl (Clare and I were Jon's Pedagogical Assistants ;)

It's too bad you can't see his bow tie up close and his rolled trousers with mismatched socks and tennis shoes. So funny...reminds me of J. Alfred Prufrock:

I grow old … I grow old …
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.
Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?

Voting 2008

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kri8G-lGYfg

6 more weeks

Feeling very eager now to behold our daughter. About six more weeks to go until due date, but she will be considered term in only four more weeks (even more, we can still deliver her at the Midwife Center if she were born in 3 more weeks, as long as it is after 36 weeks I think--otherwise hospital here we come!). Everyday feels like she grows so much...her new favorite move is pressing out one of her limbs in my right side. However she is contorted in there, she spans my entire abdomen!

Jon and I still have a few more things left to check off on baby planning, but we're feeling prepared overall. We're taking an Infant CPR class in a few weeks and still need to do baby shopping for last essentials which we'll probably get to this Saturday. In terms of American living, we rank with the simplest as far as baby items go. Except for the corner of our bedroom where we stash her clothes and blankets, you wouldn't think a baby will be living here in a month or so. No crib, no bassinet, no changing table, no baby bath, no stroller! It's actually kind of funny when I think about it, but I feel better starting off without much and acquiring what we need later as we discover that we actually need it. 

We do have a good car seat and diapers so at the least she will be safe and civilized ;)

 

An Affair for Clare

33 Weeks

I love my husband!

How is it that one day, one photo, one thought can bring joy and sorrow in the same moment... each compounding the other? The greater the joy, the more gray the absence of joy seems. The greater the sorrow, the more splendid the joy.
We are called as Christians to be a people set apart from the world, and this is where our cross and our joy lie together. The light makes the darkness so dark, yet it is the darkness that makes the light so extravagant.
***
"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12)

Trax Farms 2008

Woah 31 Weeks!

I have a very silly husband who will use any prop to get a laugh...including my headband! This is his demonstration of what Clare looks like if she resembles Jon more than me. My instructions for the photo: "Okay, now look like a little girl." Anyway, we can surmise that when Clare is a twenty-something, she will look like some version of these two goofs. 

7.5 Months in Sewickley--our favorite hangout in PA!

Prostaglandin Abortion

I am at once deeply saddened and grateful at watching this short clip. Sad, in tears in fact, because beautiful children, willed by God to exist, are killed by their parents in such a gruesome way. Grateful because of our Catholic faith that upholds the dignity of these children. Father Frank Pavone is a saint for our time and has done so much to serve and love the unborn with his life. I pray that there is an end to contraception and abortion and a new love and culture of life that treats children as incommunicable gifts instead of products to be manufactured (in vitro fertilization, surrogate motherhood, etc) or burdens (contraception--especially as it causes early abortion) --both of which are rooted in selfishness. Don't have sex if you're going to be surprised or dismayed by a pregnancy! We are not dogs or cats that need to be sterilized! We have free will--exercise it for the sake of yourself and your future children! Don't rely on your false freedom to murder your child as a way to escape responsibility for your choices! We must protect our children, not kill them in their vulnerability.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDpcj1DUcTw

"Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you."

Isaiah 49: 15

7 1/2 Months

This image perfectly illustrates the two newest sensations I have had in the last week or so: kicking/punching very high in my abdomen (which usually makes for a good arm rest except when a kick shocks you in the middle of class); and one of Clare's body members lodging itself in my ribs so that when I bend slightly to eat it ain't so pleasant. No more sipping soup for me--that bowl's coming to the face!

Jon 'helps' me make chocolate covered strawberries..

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."

Lamentations 3:22-23

Autumn in Steubenville

Very suavamente

Today Jon sends me a link to Amazon to a boxed set of philosophy DVDs with the following message:

"Clare said she wanted to buy this for her papa this Christmas! She's so cute isn't she?"

29 Weeks: Still getting use out of my old lap suit..Let's see how long I can pull this off

A small reflection on baptism as the threshold to the life of faith

Maybe the image of a river was planted in my mind from reading...but the image became a raging one at Mass this morning as I reflected on God's desire for each one of us, especially those of us who are indelibly marked with the seal of baptism.

The river rages, pulling us all along in the same direction. It is one river, as the way to salvation is through one church, one bride. The water is cleansing and powerful and regenerative, as are the sacraments. It is constantly flowing; constantly picking up new souls. It is also scary at times as we have to trust God's movement in our lives. God knows where this river is leading us even if we cannot see or comprehend its entry to the sea that is the rest and celebration of the wedding feast.

With our free will, we are free to leave this river, to hold on to some rock on the way, to hold on to some attachment to the world or to ourselves, which we call sin. We are free to pull out of it and throw ourselves on dry land since it seems easier because it may appear to be the way of less suffering, at least for the moment. But, we should remember, God's river is rushing while any stop for us is an obstacle that we place, not one that God does. His will is that the river flows and carries us to the love of the Trinity. And many a time, we can all say, God has a way of pulling us back from that rock or land or weed right back into his passionate love.

Now, what occurred most to me at Mass while I reflected on this image was why I have so often chosen, as St. Augustine says, the lesser goods to the greatest good of all? Why would any of us want to grab a rock and resist the love that constantly moves the river forward? I think there are a multitude of answers to this question. Thankfully, there are also a multitude of graces to help us all abandon ourselves to God's love and to His desire to bring us to Himself today and for eternity.

 

28 Weeks

7 Months and ready for anything!

Jon taking an hour to scrutinize the manual for Clare's car seat..which probably reminds him a lot of Aquinas' philosophical writings ;) 

And her seat is finally installed after we had purchased a different one and returned it. Clare is now going to ride in the lap of Graco luxury with her very own ducky distraction from Grandma

6 Mos 3 Weeks

Today was an exciting day. Went to a Pittsburgh Babywearers meeting and finally figured out how to use my ring sling! I was also introduced to some great ways to wear your baby in a Moby Wrap, a long piece of fabric that wraps around you and baby, distributing support very well all over. I can definitely see myself very happy with both, however, for different uses. Now, the question is whether Clare will dig them or not. Regardless, if she doesn't, then maybe the next baby will!

Anyway, I am ready to meet our daughter face to face. I have no picture in my mind of what (I should say who!) she looks like, except that I am expecting a dark haired little one. I also expect her to be long because Jon is 6'3" and I am no shrimp myself ;) but as far as her face, no idea whatsoever. All I know is I LOVE HER. I also know she is quite vivacious and likes for me to know she is there--by her wiggles and punches and somersaults. She also loves her papa already and starts to move whenever he is near and talking. A lot has been going on this month and people are right to say the second trimester rocks.

With God's grace, I am ready to die to myself for her like I do for Jon (okay, most of the time, but I am always repentant!!). Not "doing my best" like the saying goes: "She did her best as a mother." More "I suffered out of love for Christ and for her." Love is proved and perfected in suffering. My prayer is that I am humbled by motherhood, encouraged by God's love, and purified by suffering. Then I can really say that all I did for Clare was but for the grace of God and not me "doing my best" because alone my best is pretty crappy.

To vote with humility and hope on behalf of millions denied their human rights

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61wj4tJICcc

This morning since Jon had been awake all night studying...

Me: I have a new nickname for you: Study Bug.

Jon (smiling): Ok, then you're Lady Bug and Clare is Stink Bug

hahaha...stink bug??!

In Thanksgiving

"I do not know how you came into being in my womb. It was not I who gave you life and breath."

2 Macc 7:22

And the St. Augustine wishful thinking goes on...

These photos are from an email Jon sent me to try to convince me once again that he resembles the great theologian/philosopher.  Sorry, honey, but willing something doesn't make it so... You're not St. Jon of Hippo!!!

6 1/2 Months

We're down to less than 100 days... :)

Woo-hoo!! A response to Pelosi as well as an interesting and succinct read

My favorite passage is this one from the American Medical Association: "Secular laws against abortion were being reformed at the same time and in the same way, based on secular medical experts’ realization that “no other doctrine appears to be consonant with reason or physiology but that which admits the embryo to possess vitality from the very moment of conception” (American Medical Association, Report on Criminal Abortion, 1871).

Respect for Unborn Human Life: The Church’s Constant Teaching

Fact sheet by the USCCB Committee on Pro-Life Activities. Click here to print as a PDF.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states: “Since the first century the Church has affirmed the moral evil of every procured abortion. This teaching has not changed and remains unchangeable. Direct abortion, that is to say, abortion willed either as an end or a means, is gravely contrary to the moral law” (No. 2271). 

In response to those who say this teaching has changed or is of recent origin, here are the facts:

• From earliest times, Christians sharply distinguished themselves from surrounding pagan cultures by rejecting abortion and infanticide.  The earliest widely used documents of Christian teaching and practice after the New Testament in the 1st and 2nd centuries, theDidache (Teaching of the Twelve Apostles) and Letter of Barnabas, condemned both practices, as did early regional and particular Church councils.  
  
  
• To be sure, knowledge of human embryology was very limited until recent times.  Many Christian thinkers accepted the biological theories of their time, based on the writings of Aristotle (4th century BC) and other philosophers.  Aristotle assumed a process was needed over time to turn the matter from a woman’s womb into a being that could receive a specifically human form or soul.  The active formative power for this process was thought to come entirely from the man – the existence of the human ovum (egg), like so much of basic biology, was unknown.  
  
  
• However, such mistaken biological theories never changed the Church’s common conviction that abortion is gravely wrong at every stage.  At the very least, early abortion was seen as attacking a being with a human destiny, being prepared by God to receive an immortal soul (cf. Jeremiah 1:5: “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you”).
  
  
• In the 5th century AD this rejection of abortion at every stage was affirmed by the great bishop-theologian St. Augustine.  He knew of theories about the human soul not being present until some weeks into pregnancy.  Because he used the Greek Septuagint translation of the Old Testament, he also thought the ancient Israelites had imposed a more severe penalty for accidentally causing a miscarriage if the fetus was “fully formed” (Exodus 21: 22-23), language not found in any known Hebrew version of this passage.  But he also held that human knowledge of biology was very limited, and he wisely warned against misusing such theories to risk committing homicide.  He added that God has the power to make up all human deficiencies or lack of development in the Resurrection, so we cannot assume that the earliest aborted children will be excluded from enjoying eternal life with God. 
  
  
• In the 13th century, St. Thomas Aquinas made extensive use of Aristotle’s thought, including his theory that the rational human soul is not present in the first few weeks of pregnancy.  But he also rejected abortion as gravely wrong at every stage, observing that it is a sin “against nature” to reject God’s gift of a new life.
  
  
• During these centuries, theories derived from Aristotle and others influenced the grading of penalties for abortion in Church law.  Some canonical penalties were more severe for a direct abortion after the stage when the human soul was thought to be present.  However, abortion at all stages continued to be seen as a grave moral evil.  
  
  
• From the 13th to 19th centuries, some theologians speculated about rare and difficult cases where they thought an abortion before “formation” or “ensoulment” might be morally justified.  But these theories were discussed and then always rejected, as the Church refined and reaffirmed its understanding of abortion as an intrinsically evil act that can never be morally right.
  
  
• In 1827, with the discovery of the human ovum, the mistaken biology of Aristotle was discredited. Scientists increasingly understood that the union of sperm and egg at conception produces a new living being that is distinct from both mother and father.  Modern genetics demonstrated that this individual is, at the outset, distinctively human, with the inherent and active potential to mature into a human fetus, infant, child and adult.  From 1869 onward the obsolete distinction between the “ensouled” and “unensouled” fetus was permanently removed from canon law on abortion.
  
  
• Secular laws against abortion were being reformed at the same time and in the same way, based on secular medical experts’ realization that “no other doctrine appears to be consonant with reason or physiology but that which admits the embryo to possess vitality from the very moment of conception” (American Medical Association, Report on Criminal Abortion, 1871).
  
  
• Thus modern science has not changed the Church’s constant teaching against abortion, but has underscored how important and reasonable it is, by confirming that the life of each individual of the human species begins with the earliest embryo.
  
  
• Given the scientific fact that a human life begins at conception, the only moral norm needed to understand the Church’s opposition to abortion is the principle that each and every human life has inherent dignity, and thus must be treated with the respect due to a human person.  This is the foundation for the Church’s social doctrine, including its teachings on war, the use of capital punishment, euthanasia, health care, poverty and immigration.  Conversely, to claim that some live human beings do not deserve respect or should not be treated as “persons” (based on changeable factors such as age, condition, location, or lack of mental or physical abilities) is to deny the very idea of inherent human rights.  Such a claim undermines respect for the lives of many vulnerable people before and after birth.

For more information:  Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, Declaration on Procured Abortion (1974), nos. 6-7; John R. Connery, S.J., Abortion: The Development of the Roman Catholic Perspective (1977); Germain Grisez, Abortion: The Myths, the Realities, and the Arguments (1970), Chapter IV; U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, On Embryonic Stem Cell Research (2008); Pope John Paul II, Evangelium Vitae (1995), nos. 61-2.

This morning while preparing breakfast...

Jon: You know who looks like me? St. Augustine. I've never mentioned it before to anyone, but I've always thought it.

hahahaha WHAT?!

Just for measure, here is one popular depiction of the eminent 4th century Church father, theologian and philosopher from Algeria that Jon seems to think resembles himself:

Yes, Clare, your papa is one cracked egg.

First Day as a Franciscan Student!!!

After studying English at Duquesne, I can't say enough what a privilege and joy it is to study theology at Franciscan. It is so exciting to learn from the great faculty here and to be with so many beautiful Catholics from different backgrounds and almost all the states. Let's just say, it's a far cry from my "feminist" experience at Duquesne...really, if Duquesne English grad students want to learn about real femininity, they should sit in on some Franciscan classes where the women are so much more joyful and peaceful. The Catholic Church's teaching on what it is to be female and the dignity of womanhood is tremendously beautiful. Good thing feminism, like so many of the -isms, will only last so long (if it hasn't flopped over already in embarrassing error) whereas the truth is eternally appealing.  

She's a growin...24 Weeks

El Paso, Texas 2008